Wintergirls (book post)

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 Oh. My. God. This book is almost a 10/10 for me. I'd say a 9.5 overall because of the ending. Not that the ending was bad, but I'm selfish and I wanted more haha.

I LOVE the way Anderson writes. I have owned her other book Speak for almost a year (before this English course) but I never had the nerve to pick it up because I wasn't sure if it would be as good as others have said. But I'm going to go ahead and assume I've been wrong and I so desperately want to read it soon. I'm in a low place with my mental health right now, but I plan to read it hopefully in a few weeks when I know I feel better and I can handle the material.

The story was great. The pacing was phenomenal. Just... Chef's kiss. This has to be my favorite book we've read and maybe my favorite book from this year. It was so heart wrenching and it cut me deep. The imagery was one of the best things from this book. It was like each time I picked up the book, it was like a new Netflix episode was starting behind my eyelids and I could see it so clearly. If I'd had time to read it all in one go, I definitely would have. I had to stay with my Nana for a few days while I was finishing the book and I was telling her about it as I went (she's a big reader like me) and she was interested in the story, so I'll be letting her borrow it soon so we can discuss.

Getting into the writing style, the way Anderson writes Lia's inner-thoughts and feelings was spectaular. The page where all it said was "Must. Not. Eat." and it covered like three entire pages? Genius. Anderson portrays Lia's chaotic thoughts so well. It was dramatic, but not in a movie-film type of way, it was in a realistic-illness type of way, if that makes sense. I know when I'm having low days and sometimes it's like my brain tries to tell me that I need to "GoGoGoGo..." and when I'm halfway through a busy day of stress-cleaning, I will stop and realize that I'm still having a rough time, but my brain is trying to distract me from the feelings. I could tell that Lia was sick with her disorder and not just doing it for attention, like a review on Goodreads wrote. Their one star review talked about how Lia was a spoiled rich brat and only got sick for her parents attention. I could not disagree more! Having read other eating disorder books or books where the main character deals with mental illnesses, Lia isn't doing it just for attention. She's doing it because she's suffering. Yes, she's not getting the attention every child deserves, but it's not the sole reason, it's just a participating cause along with so many other things.

I felt every single emotion Lia felt as she struggled so hard. When she stabbed herself with the knife, I actually felt like I might feel the sharp pain too. It was devastating and I'll admit, I cried more than once during my reads of this book. It was hevay, but not in a triggering way. Just a heavy topic with emotional story-telling. Not that I enjoyed her bitterness and resentment, but I understood it to a level that I wish I didn't. At times, I saw myself in Lia, even without ever having a firsthand experience with an eating disorder or anorexia. I thought the portrayal of eating disorders was so well written by Anderson and I will definitely read this book again in a few months or years. It will be on my bookshelf and I am hoping to try Anderson's Speak soon as well. Wintergirls was such a good read for me.

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